A Summer Secret.. SShhhh

Written as a part of Shopo's Saturday Superloot Contest. If you havn't yet had a look at Shopo, head over there now, and have a look at the totally amazing stuff they offer (specially the sarees).

Summer is not my favourite season, by any stretch of imagination. But like any season, it has its high times and "Secrets" :) Some secrets should remain secrets, with only the wind, sun and rain as witnesses. But others, bring back fond memories, urging you to share the happiness.

I was in class II at the time (summer of 1992) and my elder sister was in Class VII, of the same school. Although we studied in the same school, we never met during school hours. Being a puny class II kid, I was fascinated by all these senior "didis" around me. I wanted to know where their class was, where they ate their tiffin, and maybe you know they didn't have any teachers! So one day, I followed one of my sisters friends and sneaked up to where they were having their lunch. And lo and behold, what do I see.. the forbidden sin. My sister was having an orange ice cream! Ice creams were prohibited for us, given our propensity to fall sick at the drop of a hat.

I still remember the shock on my sisters face when she saw me standing there. I had caught her red-handed, and the tattletale that I was, she knew she was in for trouble. I was seething with anger. How dare she have an ice cream without me? I am never going to share any chocolate, coke, chips with her. I won't even give her the window seat in the car! And then, came the worst shock. One of her friends said, "Whats the big deal? You eat one everyday na?". OMG. Really?

My sister thought fast on her feet. "I'll buy you as many ice creams as you want. But don't tell mom". What? She was trying to bribe me? Huh. But, a seven year old, craving icecream, will do anything for it! And so, after school, while we waited for car pool.. didi bought me an orange ice cream (she also had another one!!). And it became our little secret.

When I grew up, I have often wondered that did mom really not know? With our orange tongues and orange lips? She knew. But she just let us have our very own "Summer Secret".

The Girl child

And while I was busy celebrating the fact that I am still unmarried at 28, I came across this link. According to a recent Unicef report, almost half the women born in India are married off before they turn 18, while 18 per cent of them are below 15. And whats more? Among those married, 22 per cent became mothers before they got the right to vote! 


It makes me realise how little I know. I think child marriage is prohibited, and that means it doesn't happen. I guess I'm wrong. The law in India is merely a formality, be it child marriage laws or anti dowry laws. The larger problem is the society.


The society which still considers women as second class citizens and a girl child as a burden. And how can this stop? when we stop treating girls as "paraya dhan". Treat them as children, teenagers.. treat them as humans, who have their own opinions and rights. 


I do realise that the women in the statistics above would mostly belong to the lower strata of society, where the parents are possibly not aware of the perils of child marriage.. maybe due to the lack of education. However, chandigarh, the UT with the highest GDP per capita, has the lowest sex ratio! It makes me wonder that the hatred for females has nothing to do with education whatsoever! If education can't cure it, what can?

Celebrating Myself

What could I possibly celebrate about myself? I'm 28 and all my friends are either married, or pregnant while I am still single. All of my MBA batchmates (and I mean all), are working in top notch companies while I have chosen to tread the path less taken, and set up my own establishment. My mean relatives still ask me curiously at every family dinner, "So, have you finally started working somewhere?". Of course, this they ask only when they don't find an answer to their favourite question of "Beta, when are you getting married. You are getting old." It's a miracle I havn't punched them as yet! And you know, I havn't updated my blog in ages :(

So, coming back to the point, what could I possibly celebrate about myself?
I celebrate my independence and freedom. The ability to free myself from stereotypical thoughts and follow my heart. So what if people feel I should marry at 22? I would rather wait for the right man (And I hope he comes along soon!). And so what if I don't have a fancy company or designation to show off? I'd rather be my own boss and do what I love doing. I celebrate this ability to have the courage to be different from the crowd. Be it choosing to give up science after plus two (Haww, you will do B.Com.. that is for losers!), or choosing to not sit for placements during MBA (Yes, yes... I know, I'm crazy). I'm glad I chose to do it that way, because the happiness and satisfaction i feel today is unmatched.

I celebrate my ability to find joy and happiness in small things, like the petunias in the garden or the dogs running in the park or even the ladybird walking on the leaf! I know the world is not a very nice place, forget the wars and famines, just the bitterness, jealousy and hypocrisy we endure everyday is depressing. Yet, I choose to be optimistic about things, always. And I feel, that's half the battle won. I also celebrate the fact that I forgive easily (and sometimes that comes back to haunt me real bad, but I like it this way). I'd rather forgive and regret.. than harbour hatred.

I celebrate the God given gift of patience and "the art of listening", which has helped me dry the tears of so many friends, by doing nothing more than listening. In this busy world, where people hardly have the time to stop and stare, I am glad that don't mind stopping and listening. I am glad that I still care. And while I may be a successful entrepreneur, a great professional and blah and blah... this is the one aspect of my being that I celebrate the most!

And last, but not the least, I celebrate my parents, each and every day, each and minute. The parents who are absolutely okay with their daughter still being unmarried at 28 and choosing an unknown profession. Who encourage me to think for myself, be independent, be self sufficient and be full of warmth, compassion and humanity. I know that no matter what happens in life, no matter what crap I get myself into... I can always fall back on my parents.

Thank you Mom and Dad, for giving me so reasons to celebrate!

PS: A part of Women's web International Women's day Contest.

When Parents Text - Review

Author - Sophia Fraioli and Lauren Kaelin
Amazon Link: http://www.amazon.com/When-Parents-Text-Said-So-Understood/dp/0761166041

Have you ever read a book that makes you laugh so hard that you end up crying? "When Parents Text: So much said, So little Understood" is one such hilarious, addictive and side splitting read.

Aimed at people like us, the recent graduates who are well conversant with technology and whose parents have learnt messaging, facebook, internet etc in a bid to keep in touch with us (or maybe keep tabs on us?!), the book is a collection of funny and awkward text messages exchanged between parents and their kids.

A few excerpts from the book:
Grandmom: Do I need to switch on the computer to be able to skype?
Me: ...

=================================

Mom: dig up some tadpoles on ur way homo.
Me: ummm, what?
Mom: It autocorrected me. I mean to say dig up some tadpoles on ur way homo.
(4 minutes later)
Mom: PICK UP SOME TAMPONS ON YOUR WAY HOME.

Apart from being crazily funny and spookily true, what I really like about the book is that you don't have to read all of it at one go and can enjoy it over a long period of time. It acts as a immediate mood enhancer when you are feeling low. So keep it by your bedside, and enjoy. Gift it to your parents and see them laugh and roll over, all while feeling proud that they aren't the only ones who have sent silly messages and made technological faux pas'.
And if you want to read more such funny messages, go to their website http://whenparentstext.com/

PS: For people who are not exactly "message savvy", like me.. there is a "emoticon glossary", so that we can save ourselves from further embarrassments :P

Facebook Display of Affection

This post is inspired by some very interesting FDA activity. Not aware of what FDA is? Well u better become acquainted with it fast.. it is going to invade your minds and computers soon.

The full form is - Facebook Display of Affection and believe me it can be much worse than PDA sometimes since there is a lot left to imagination! Don't get me wrong, I love Facebook.. and I love the fact that I can connect with long lost friends (and family too :P). I enjoy seeing photos and the status updates.. even if they may be as stupid as "Going to sleep"!?!

However, I think there is a limit to how much I want to know (or is there!). Is there some virtual ettiquette book that I am not aware of? How is one supposed to react when u see two "lovers" coochie-cooing on each others walls? And seriously, why are they doing it on your wall?!? And is it just me who is laughing? Do you really think the world is interested in knowing that u are in a "complicated relationship" and why?

A recent FDA example, "I love you my hubby, U are my everything."If this came from a married couple, I would have probably overlooked it but pls note that this couple is not yet married and not even engaged!

Secondly, even if they were married, they should be declaring their love to each other instead of announcing it on the world wide web! Btw, if they are loyal fans of FB and just have to communicate via FB.. I just want to let them know that FB has a "message" option.. and it is meant to be used!
I once indirectly told this person to abstain from FDA. Needless to say, not only did I fail miserably but I was also accused of being "Jealous"!?! Umm.. jealous I dunno.. but I am incredibly thankful to this person for providing me with a reason to laugh this evening and curing my year long writers block!

Do you people have any interesting FDA instances to share? What are your views? Lemme know..


PS: A big thank you to the loyal followers of my blog who have been pestering me to update. Thank you for your patience :)